The following celebs and débucunts had the awkest first tweets ever formulated. I recommend readers to fav these tweets, ad-lib+ad-hoc, and imagine how creepy it is when someone favs your faeces from 5 years ago. Poop from the past.
Mostly celebs would be aloof about their primal tweets, however, a few egomaniacs mentioned below decided to mess with history and delete their disgraceful first ever tweets. I’ve found them nonetheless.
1. Mia Farrow. 5:18 PM – 19 Apr 2009
this is my first tweet. I’m starting a hunger strike on the 27th. Im gonna try to do it for 3 weeks but dont know if I can last that long.
— mia farrow (@MiaFarrow) April 19, 2009
Mia, why did you stay on Twitter past these 3 weeks?
2. Miley Ray Cyrus. 1:33 AM – 30 Mar 2011
Welcome to the official Miley Cyrus “Gypsy Heart Tour” twitter page!!! — Miley Ray Cyrus (@MileyCyrus) March 30, 2011
Not fair that Miley’s current profile pic is attached to her old devout tweets.
3. Guido Fawkes. 9:05 AM – 25 Feb 2008
Am experimenting with Twittering my blog headlines via Twitterfeed api — Guido Fawkes (@GuidoFawkes) February 25, 2008
‘Twittering’, ‘Twitterfeed’, ‘Hyphenation’.
4. Mehdi Hasan. 6:15 PM – 7 Apr 2010
The general election has inspired me (!) to sign up to Twitter. I can now “tweet”. Like a bird. Or not. Hello cyber-world! Stay tuned…
— Mehdi Hasan (@mehdirhasan) April 7, 2010
The general election has inspired me to unfollow Mehdi.
5. Sir Alex Ferguson. 8:00 AM – 25 Mar 2010
My lads thought that it would be a great idea if I interact with United fans online. And so here I am.
— Sir Alex Ferguson (@MrAlexFerguson) March 25, 2010
Wish I’d been an Alex lad.
6. Gawker. 7:48 PM – 17 Sep 2007
Did Fox censor Sally Field? http://tinyurl.com/27k75l — Gawker (@Gawker) September 17, 2007
Could’ve started with something a bit more hilarious than Sally Effing Field.
7. Lily Allen. 1:32 PM – 30 Jan 09
is with justin and alan, learning to be a lady — Lily Allen (@lilyallen) January 30, 2009
Classic premonogamous Lily.
8. Alain de Botton. (Approx.) 4:50 PM – 28 Oct 2009
Journeys are the midwives of thought.
— Alain de Botton (@alaindebotton) October 28, 2009
His real first tweet was deleted sometime between now and October 2009. Here it is, still lame:
9. Fred Macpherson. 11:19 AM – 25 Mar 2009
Highlights of the week so far: Solid Horrors comeback. Disabled woman breaking bus. Fake Scarlett Johannsson @ Mr Hudson / Alan Pownall gig.
— Fred Macpherson (@fredmacpherson) March 25, 2009
Fred is the only unverified person on this list. Google him.
10. Fatima Bhutto. (Approx.) 5:22 PM – 22 Oct 09
Her first tweet was deleted. Here it is –
Fatima then carried on to date George Clooney and to despise her niece Benazir Bhutto. Benazir herself never tweeted.
* Users mentioned above can make this story partly obsolete by deleting their first tweets right now. ALERT